Stream of Consciousness (Writing101 HW1)

Hey my 20 minutes is starting. Okay, I’m really nervous, this is nerve-wrecking. Ever since I was a child and got into writing, it has always been a standard for me to submit essays, writings, or any of some sort in the highest possible quality I can and prove that I’m good at writing. So, this exercise for me is really nerve-wrecking because I am just basically typing everything that goes into my mind and I think my mind is just going to panic mode. Gosh, I just stopped and re-read my previous sentence. Okay, that is not good, that;s breaking the rules! Alright–I am stopping re-reading. I should just go on.

So basically today I just went on a “me-time” where I spend hours outside of the house and go somewhere where I feel comfortable to just roam around and think about stuff I have going on with my life, or just reading, writing or mostly just watching movies to relax myself. This occurred to me the last time I was so problematic and I couldn’t count on anyone to listen to what I was saying (therefore resulted into creating a blog) and I read somewhere where they suggested to have a free personal time once a week just to kind of return to the “default” mode. I forgot the exact advise but well that was how I interpreted it. For the first few weeks that I’ve tried it, I was so anxious because I really didn’t know what to do. In fact, I thought I should plan my day on how I’d spend it to achieve “maximum results” and I thought that after that day I would be rejuvenated. I ended up overthinking what to do and expecting results that I kind of frustrated myself all throughout the day with all kinds of stuff like.. “So when am I suppose to feel renewed?” and all that. So that day went kind of terribly wrong so I .. wait I just noticed that the word “overthinking” has red underline.. wait, isn’t that a formal word? Wasn’t it supposed to? Oh gosh, I just skipped over the topic. Oh, where was I ? RIght! (I’ll deal with that underline thingy later) So yeah, then I realized I was going the “me time” wrong so the next week I just decided to ride with the wind and do whatever my mood sets me to do so. I ended up enjoying myself window shopping and hopping to bookstores and kind of every type of store really! I just enjoyed the colors, I didn’t care what objects they were– food, clothing, school supplies, bags, shoes, make up, I even went to find bakeshops at the top floors on the most further part of the mall where I don’t really go to. It was nice! So there, actually the article said that it’s healthier to kind of have the personal time everyday but only set specific minutes or an hour or so so that when you feel stressed or anything you can calm yourself. Thanks to that article, I’ve actually started a habit that I think is healthy for me.. Yes I do think it’s healthy for me. I call it my “me-time” and I characterize that by me going to my “default mode” where I just focus on going back to being myself and do whatever it is I want to do not because of whatever the society expects me to do but because it’s what my heart tells me to do. Even though it’s just for a few hours once a week, it gives me strength to go on my life for the rest of the days and be able to just take on whatever the world throws at me.

Wow this is nice, I think I was starting this post way nervous and I have no idea how I just started to calm down and just go on a single topic in mind. Hmm, thanks Writing101 and Blogging University! I don’t know what the objective of this homework was but I kinda think I’m learning something but the funny thing is I don’t really know what it is. Hmmm, the thought that I have to publish this is ,making me nervous >_< Gosh, hmm, do I have to..? Errrr.. Hmmm.. This is embarrassing T_T I’ve probably just written a bunch of nonsense, gosh. Well, here it goes…

Writing 101 Homework 1 is done ! 😀


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